Everyday Courtesy

The Gifts of Experience

Everyday Courtesy

Message #6

(Note: Phil and his wife are such beautiful Souls and have so much to share that we asked them to start writing down some of their vast experiences so that others may learn from them… Enjoy!! Celest and David)

I spent close to 40 years in the business world, mostly in the financial end of the business.  I found out along the way that there were a couple of phrases that could make a small but significant impact upon the person(s) you were dealing with.

Phrase No. 1 is only two words, but they are very powerful.  They are, “THANK YOU.”  It takes very little effort to say them, after all they’re only two words, but they can make a significant difference.  I had various managerial positions and I found that if I said “thank you” to the people working with me, for tasks they completed for me, they would respond, sometimes with a smile and nod or a “you are welcome.”

Now I know some folks reading this are thinking to themselves, is this guy for real? … I don’t have time to be thanking employees all the time for doing their jobs.  There was a time when I had this same mindset, but then something prodded me to change and start saying thank you.  At first, I had to consciously remember to say it and then after a period of time it was automatic.  And then I soon realized that it couldn’t be just automatic, but had to be sincere and heartfelt.  A wonderful thing happened … employees got tasks done quicker and with better results.

Then as you use your newfound discovery, you expand upon the two words.  You add something like, “You did a good job on this”, or you personalize it to the specific task.  Both you and the employee feel good about the situation.   And you may find that giving a “Job Well Done” results in a lot more jobs being well done in the future.  Over the years you can even get to the point that I did when I heard through the employee grapevine that people working in the company “liked working for me” and liked having me for their boss.  The employee grapevine has been known to be the unvarnished opinion of various people in the company.

Since what seemed to be beneficial when dealing with employees, was then transferred to my written communications.  Whenever I sent a letter, memo or email requesting information, I added the phrase, “Thank you for your help in this matter.”  Did I have to add this to the communication?  No, after all the addressee was probably trying to sell me some product or perform some service for the company I worked for.  But it just seemed the right thing to do.  Do I know if adding the phrase made a difference on the other end?  No, I don’t!  I only know that it made me feel better about respecting the other person’s time and effort to get the information to me.

Over the years, the “Thank You” has been used in a number of different situations.  When paying for a purchase at the counter, I say thank you to the sales person.  I’m sure the sales person may be a little surprised because they were trained to be the one to say thank you to the customer.  Their thank you to me is for shopping at the establishment they work for.  But my thank you to them is to let them know that I appreciate them taking care of my purchase.  It’s just a little thing, but I believe it makes a difference in everybody’s day.

I mentioned above that something “prodded” me to start saying thank you.  I believe this “prodding” comes to us from having signposts designed into our Soul Contracts, Pre-Birth Agreements or Life Plans.  Everybody has some degree of intuition, or better said we all have the full complement of intuition but some of us don’t always heed our intuition.  It may be intuition that the Soul uses to prod us to take an action.  Anyway you look at it, listening to your intuition can assist you in your daily task of making decisions and what appropriate actions to take.

Then there is Phrase No. 2.  There is the standard greeting when you come up to the counter in a restaurant or retail store and the clerk says, “How are you today?”  I say to them, “I’m fine … and how are you?”  Many times this generates a smile.  This is really nice!  Smiles are good no matter when they are given.  There was one time that I have to tell you about because it has stayed in my memory for many years.   I don’t remember the establishment, but the person who came to wait on me was a very tall, large lady who had the most beautiful smile.  With a smile she said the customary, “How are you today?”  And I responded with, “I’m fine, but how are you today?”  Well, the room just LIT UP with her beautiful smile!!  Her eyes danced and her whole being exuded a friendliness that was magnificent.  She made me feel like I was the most important person that she had ever helped.  Long after this happening it occurred to me that I might have been in the presence of an angel.  It is a wonderful experience and anyone can have it, but you do have to participate with a response of, “I’m fine, but how are you?”  To this day I continue to respond on the chance that I will someday meet another angel.

There are a great many situations where using courtesy would be the preferred manner to handle an interaction with another.  Probably one of the most frequent places is on the super highways of the country.  (Oh boy, now this guy is going to tell us how to drive.)  No it’s just a suggestion for the future.  Right now we have a small number of folks who drive with some road rage.  Extending courtesy to these people may take an effort, but may also be the safer method of traveling.  And when you think about what the future could bring us with a lot of potential strife, the road rage folks may multiply on our roads.

People will always travel in access of the speed limit, some by five miles over to some who seem to have no limit to the speed they travel.  Yes I know it is against the law in almost all states.  Staying in the left lane of the freeway, because you are doing the speed limit and so should everyone else, is a way to upset the potential road rage enthusiasts.  You may be in the right, but you may also end up on the losing end of an accident.  My wife and I travel a lot on the interstate highway system and we see a great many situations where things could have turned out bad.

Now I have to tell you that this concept of extending courtesy on the roadways is one that I have long had to work at.  And I am still working at it.  One situation that has taken a lot of work is when dealing with 18 wheelers.  They always seem to wait until I get close enough to pass them and then they pull out in the left lane to pass another 18 wheeler who is going about a half mile per hour slower than they are.  It takes a long time for them to make the pass and it can be frustrating.

However when you consider that the truckers are probably trying to maximize their fuel economy and can do so by maintaining a steady speed, then they really are not trying to make you mad, but are doing what they do for a good reason.  And recently when I see the same situation developing, I signal them to go ahead and make the pass.  Then after they have made their pass and I subsequently pass them they give a wave of thanks when I pass the tractor.  So I extend the courtesy and they thank me … everyone feels good and positive and each of us are sending out positive thoughts into the universe instead of negative thoughts.

Why extend any courtesy??  Some might say, “I don’t always get courtesy extended to me so why should I extend courtesy to another?”  Because we have to start somewhere to try to make a difference in this world we live in.  WE are responsible for making the world of the future into a place that we wish to live in.  AND ALL must participate in making these changes.  Now some may be saying, “What can I do, I’m just one person without any influence?”  Well, extending courtesy is an easy way to start and it doesn’t cost you anything.  JUST DO IT!!  It makes no difference if you are a person who has very little, a person who is in the middle income group or a person who is a multi-billionaire; we can all make an effort to be courteous and respect each other.  Regardless of our economic position in life, we are all Souls having a physical incarnation that we chose in our pre-birth agreement.  If you have the ability to make big positive changes, do so.  If you have the ability to make small positive changes, do so.  All positive actions add up.  And likewise all negative actions like getting upset with another driver on the freeway also add up to produce an undesirable outcome.  Choose the positive approach and help the humanity of this world change for the good.

Until the next time, Phil

The Gifts of Experience / www.awakenedhearts.com