The Gifts of Experience
A Special Gift
(Note: Phil and his wife are such beautiful Souls and have so much to share that we asked them to start writing down some of their vast experiences so that others may learn from them… Enjoy!! Celest and David)
My wife and I had traveled some distance to be with our daughter for the birth of our first granddaughter. Today was the day that the doctors had determined should be far enough in advance of the due date to eliminate the possibility of an emergency birth. You see the doctors had already determined that our granddaughter had a hole in her heart and that the birth could be very difficult. They knew to look for a defect because early on in the pregnancy they had found that our granddaughter would be a Down syndrome baby.
Of course the doctors had discussed the options available to our daughter and her husband regarding carrying a baby that would suffer from Down syndrome. There was the option to terminate the pregnancy, but that choice never figured into the decision by her parents. So there we were waiting for the doctor to start the birth process by inducing labor. The NICU was prepped and ready. The actual birth was by all standards an easy birth and the little girl was rushed to the NICU.
Considering her medical condition, her stay in NICU wasn’t really that long. After two-three days in the hospital, the doctors decided to let her go home. Immediately the little girl had a very difficult struggle to gain weight. Because the heart had the defect she had to work very hard to get 4 ounces of milk into her stomach. It took her about 15-20 minutes to drink that much milk. And at the end of that time she was exhausted. The doctors had told us that they wanted to wait at least nine months and that she needed to weigh at least 12 pounds prior to performing the operation to close the hole in her heart. However, the little girl couldn’t wait that long.
At five months we made the trip back to the same hospital where she was born to be with our daughter and her husband during the operation that would close the hole in her heart. Ever wonder how often miracles happen? Or better yet ever wonder when it is that you see the Universe in action? Between the birth of our granddaughter and the decision to operate on her heart, a new surgeon skilled in congenital heart surgery had come to town and he would perform the surgery. Now just think about what he had to do. He had to close a hole in her heart and her heart was about the size of a walnut!
I don’t recall how long the surgery took because this occurred over 12 years ago. But I do remember vividly visiting the recovery room and how our granddaughter looked laying on that hospital bed. Her body took up about 20% of the space on the bed and the machines and tubes and other paraphernalia took up the rest of the bed. What a site! There were nurses and respiratory therapists around the bed constantly checking to see that everything was going well. Subsequent tests reflected that the surgeon had not been able to completely close the hole, but over the next few years the hole did close up.
After recovery from the surgery, she immediately started to grow and improve. She could zip down 4 ounces of milk in nothing flat and she began to gain weight and she seemed to make up for lost time.
Some may be wondering when reading this far, why did he title this piece, “A Special Gift”. After all raising a special needs child can present a multitude of challenges. I can only answer this with my own feelings. If I didn’t fully understand it before, my granddaughter has taught me about the concept of “Unconditional Love”. Very quickly she and I have forged a special bond that I don’t have with any other of my grandchildren and I know that it will last forever. Many times when I was holding her as a baby and when she was sleeping, I would try to will my body to send her the healing power that would make everything right for her. Did it do any good? No one knows, but it did help me to believe that I was doing all that I could for her. Now it is absolutely wonderful when she frequently comes up to me and says: “I love you grandpa”. She doesn’t have any hidden agenda for saying this to me; she just does so from time to time.
As she grew older, we found that she had a definite speech issue that may be difficult to improve or overcome. It is this issue that causes her to be quiet and shy. However she can hold her own when dealing with her siblings at home. She also struggled in school in the early years because the family lived in a state that did not provide adequate resources dedicated to special needs children. She had been mainstreamed in school with little or no assistance provided to the teacher which could have given our granddaughter much needed one-on-one help. A career move to another state changed all of that. Our granddaughter is able to attend a private school for special needs children and she has blossomed in this program. Although we do not live close enough to know all that she goes through, we believe she has a number of friends who treat her just like any other teen. On a very recent 13th birthday she received over 120 birthday wishes on her parent’s face-book page.
There are physical characteristics that reflect that she is a Down syndrome child, but they are not prominent in nature and at times are not apparent. But even if she develops more pronounced physical characteristics as she grows older, would that make a difference to me? No! Because I know that she is a Soul who is having a physical incarnation as a Down syndrome person. Her Soul is as perfect as any other Soul in the Universe.
When she and all who are related to her were building their pre-birth agreements, she was the Soul who agreed to this physical life as a Down syndrome person. Why? So that she and all of the others could have the experience of such a life. THAT IS WHY THIS IS A SPECIAL GIFT!! The Soul of my granddaughter gave away the option to have a “normal life” in order to experience a life as a Down syndrome person so that the rest of us could have the experience of being with her through this lifetime. I am extremely fortunate to have her in my life.
Now let me go back to the mention of the options that the doctor gave to her parents when it was determined that the baby would be a Down syndrome baby. They could terminate the pregnancy or they could go ahead like they did and give birth to the baby. Now some may say that abortion would not be right and others would say that a Down syndrome diagnosis would be a valid reason for abortion from an ethical standpoint. But it really doesn’t make any difference what everyone else thinks or believes; it only matters what was agreed upon in the pre-birth agreements by all the Souls involved. Either route the parents selected to either terminate the pregnancy or give birth would provide the experiences that all Souls had agreed to and that is the only thing that is important!
Since the timeframe of our granddaughter’s birth, I now have a better understanding about pre-birth agreements and I view special needs people in a different light. I now know that they are all Special Gifts to all they come in contact with. All are perfect Souls who are going through a physical life to experience a lifetime as a special needs person. What all Souls are experiencing IS what our Souls agreed to prior to any physical lifetime.
Until next time, Phil
The Gifts of Experience / www.awakenedhearts.com